5-20-2023 : Graduation Day

Commencements were a week ago. It's been a week since I have talked to Nathara. 
Lynda and Tom won't talk to me, no one will tell me where she went. She's just gone. Just like that. 

She sat there, in the moonlight, smoking a joint and just told me she had to go. 

I had told her my plan. We would leave for the other side of the country. She could come with me, we would be dirt fucking poor, but we would make it work. 

She laughed at me. It broke me. She laughed. She looked away, lit up a fucking joint and told me to go without her. She had other commitments. 

I begged her. I really tried to get her to listen to me. And talk to me. It was like night and day. I met her in freshman year. Literature. I hated it. She took pity on me, and the rest is history. 

I don't know what to do. If I leave, I leave everything, everyone. 

If I stay, I am doomed to a life that feels fake. Something is wrong. 

People talk in whispers. They close the doors and hold meetings. And they look at us, by us I mean young adults, and they .... seem almost anxious. As if something is going to happen. But no one is saying a damn thing.